the confessions of Analyst
by maboru tataki
Summary: Naruto Uzumaki is living in a suite at Globe Towers, the most luxurious place in the most luxurious city of Fire Country. He has and knows the latest trends. He likes to believe he is the epitome of the word fabulous- and yes he is gay. Not the flamboyant type though. He is more than that; he is F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S! But there is something oh so dirty about it, about himself. He can't j


Naruto Uzumaki is living in a suite at Globe Towers, the most luxurious place in the most luxurious city of Fire Country. He has and knows the latest trends. He likes to believe he is the epitome of the word fabulous- and yes he is gay. Not the flamboyant type though. He is more than that; he is F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S!

But there is something oh so dirty about it, about himself. He can't just afford being fabulous and his job at _EconoMedia _as a Researcher t doesn't pay much to compensate his daring expenses.

**ONE**

**Bank of Kirigakure**

Leaf Street

Kirigakure

Mr. Naruto Uzumaki

Suite 13

Ground Heights

Kirigakure

30 November 2009

Congratulation Mr. Uzumaki! As a newly graduate of Kiri Institute of Technology, you are certainly proud of your performance.

We at Kirigakure are also proud of our performance with accounts suited to everyone. We are known to be caring and elastic bank and we take pride in accommodating personalities with quality like yours.

We are therefore offering you, Mr. Uzumaki—as a graduate—a free extended overdraft facility of ¥500,000 during the first two years of your career. As you may decide to open an account with Kirigakure; this facility will be available immediately* I do hope you decide to take advantage of this unique offer and look forward to receiving your completed form.

Once again, congratulations!

Yours sincerely,

Pandora Hamilton

Graduate Marketing Manager

* (subject to status)

* * *

**Kirigakure- Your Future**

Bank of Kirigakure

Konoha Branch

End Street

Konoha

Mr. Naruto Uzumaki

Suite 9

Globe Towers

Konoha

12 September 2011

Dear Mr. Uzumaki:

Added to my letters of 21 June and 6 July you will be aware that your free graduate overdraft facility is due to end on 23 September will also be aware that you have substantially exceeded the agreed limit of ¥500,000.

Your current balance stands at the debit of ¥750,400.

You may call my assistant, Sakura Haruno, at the number attached herewith to arrange a meeting regarding this matter.

Yours sincerely,

Masashi Kishi-motto

Manager

* * *

**Kirigakure- Your Future**

Bank of Kirigakure

Konoha Branch

End Street

Konoha

Mr. Naruto Uzumaki

Suite 9

Globe Towers

Konoha

12 September 2011

Dear Mr. Uzumaki:

I am sorry to hear you have broken your ribs.

When you have fully recovered, maybe you can phone my assistant, Sakura Haruno, to arrange a meeting in order to discuss your ongoing overdraft needs.

Yours sincerely,

Masashi Kishi-motto

Manager

* * *

**Kirigakure- Your Future**

"Oh my God!

I'm dead. I have no future!

Oh my God."

I know my eyes are wide now in disbelief, who wouldn't? I can feel the sweats forming on my creasing forehead, I just know I'm frowning right now, who wouldn't? What to do?

After few seconds of contemplation, somehow, I have come to reason it out.

This is just a VISA bill, right? It's a piece of paper; come on, just how scary can a few numbers be?

_Scary as hell. Remember the accounting subject you took? So how much will it be? 12,600? 12, 620? _

"Shut up!"

"Who must?"

I turned my head to the right, the table next to mine, Kiba Inuzuka has barked. The nerve of the guy kills me every time.

"No one in particular" I said lightly. He may sense something and pry. The dog likes to put his nose everywhere. He'll bite soon.

"Whatcha doing? You look sick" he said while piling up the papers scattered on his desk and clipped them in separate folders with "Critical" and "Mild" prints. I loathe him.

"Reading a letter and I'm fine" I flipped the envelope on my table but I couldn't pull the contents inside. Again, my mind floats in the realm of my secret dream. The dream I hoped would come true. I've heard it has happened long ago. I know it will happen to me.

Do you want to know it? It's based from the story I heard it from my Papa, long time ago an Emperor had lost his son during their travel having ambushed by group of bandits. After 20 years the Emperor's son has magically appeared. He was rescued by a couple of peasants. He had grown as a peasant. Never did he know that he's the son of the Emperor. One day the Emperor paid a visit to the country-side; there he met his son who is quite his resemblance. After examining him, they found out that the peasant is the emperors' son. The Emperor took him back to the palace and rewarded the peasants for raising his son. The son was able to enjoy a luxurious life then and had done his duty as the successor well- he had sympathy with the peasants."

And ever since I've heard that, my secret fantasy is that to happen to me. I am adopted, I got blue shinning eyes like those of the royal bloods, I got vivid blond hair that says "I'm a royalty" and most of the fellows there at my hometown in Kiri say I resemble someone who's noble. Maybe that _someone_ is my father. He's a noble man! Then one day, maybe tomorrow, he'll come knocking on my flat asking me to come with him. After undergoing some series of tests such as DNA, they'll find I am really his son, I'll go running to Papa and thank him. I'll even ask my real father to give him some incentives for raising me to become a fine man. Fair's fair after all. And I'll be able to buy the things I want. Maybe hire the chef at Giacomino. I love their sweets.

I opened my eyes and smiled at the thought of it. I haven't noticed I closed them. I know it will happen, and my smile turned into a full blast grin. I looked over the street below over the window on the left side of my desk. I can't help grinning; I am convinced it will happen soon, very soon. Perhaps tonight, I won't be surprised if _someone_ will come knockin' on my door tonight or tomorrow morning. I'm excited!

But when I finally pulled the bill out of the envelope, my grin faltered. I bit my lip as I am nervous, fucking nervous! I'm in the state I were minutes ago. The feeling like somebody punched my throat and put an iron rod. I couldn't breathe for seconds. I am panicking the fact that the dog keeps on staring at me. Panic plus irritation equates to internal turmoil, my stomachs churning.

Hmmm, as I skim through the page, a series of familiar names rush through my keen eyes like stalls in the mall selling overpriced items. I'm trying to get in but I couldn't. It's not worth it.

Wait, what? The hell with not worth it! This may be worth than your own life!

OK! Stop it, man, you're over thinking it. It'll do no good. Don't skim, read slowly. Now, Davies Grab A Crab. What the heck I was doing there? Don't I have an allergy on crustaceans? Oh my God? This can't be mine! Shit! Don't panic! Easy there man. Okay, from the top.

_Giacomino (box of cake- vital)_

_Natasha (what the… oh yeah, undies for Tsunade)_

_Frame Your Fame (it was on sale my pic fits in it)_

_Bling Bling (that stupid obnoxious plain orange shirt! I love Orange though)_

_Liquors (a must try wine)_

_Gacomino (box of chocolate- vital)_

_Liquors (a must have!)_

_Pedricos (expensive but it's for my birthday)_

_RD wares…_

No way, I've never been at RD's! I stopped at my tracks; I know my brows are working why. Then I gasp! I knew it! That's why these all doesn't fit my style! I am being robbed without my notice. It's a crime and I've been the victim!

It all makes sense! Oh my God! No! Somebody got a free shopping spree in Konoha with my card!

But, but how? I look around the office. Whoever it is, is dumb. Using my card at RD! It's almost laughable. As if I'd ever shop there.

Oh! I came into realization like a scientist finally got the right result. Eureka! Crystal clear! The Dog! I look suspiciously at the horrendous monkey-dog next to me.

"I've never been at RD's!" I said a little bit louder just for him to hear me. That way I could notice if he'll act strange.

"Yes you have" he said nonchalantly. How could he when it's obvious? Heh, I've got you now dog. I smiled a little.

"You bought Kotetsu's present at RD's, didn't you?"

And the dog bit me. Just like that I recalled why I got the bill from there, Kotetsu, our senior editor who left the office last month. I volunteered to buy his present with a bag of paper bills and coins the whole group contributed. But I bought the gift using my card. I thought the money will last me for weeks. I didn't realize the evening after that that the ¥100's gone.

"What's with it anyways?" Kiba leans forward; I knew he's looking over my bill.

"Nothing," I said as I flip the second page of my statement. Instead of stuffing it back in my bag like I normally do and ignore the small amount it states, I found myself staring at the numbers at the bottom of the paper- ¥57,405.30.

For a minute I sat with my jaw dropping. And without realizing it I stuff the bill into my bag. I breathe gulps of conditioned air to calm my thudding heart. I thought as though this has nothing to do with. Perhaps I could throw this paper and claim that I haven't received any.

I've never anticipated this. Blitzkrieg attack!

Don't panic, everything will be fine. I told myself many times like some sort of mantra.

"Ok there Blondie?" apparently, Kiba's been watching at my momentary gloom to doom like a soap opera.

"Yeah" I groaned literally.

"Anyways, are you done with Croissant?" he asked.

"Nearly." I said while typing on the keyboard just to make an impression that I am really doing it.

… marketers who arbitrarily assume they know what are the consumers wants are likely to be a failure in the business.

Why do I do this anyway? Who cares about the marketers? I'm one hell of a consumer, yes, so what?

… successful marketers do not necessarily offer a product or service better than their competitors. The superiority of their products of services may be in the form of lower cost, attractive packaging, and greater convenience than the product or services offered by their less successful competitors.

"Done!" I exclaimed. Stretched my fingers and took a sip of my coffee. Two hours typing I should consider a break. And this is my job. _Yeah_… A marketing research ASSISTANT at EconoMedia. We are tasked to do researches for other company.

I do researches for others. I don't like this at all. You know, being a researcher means you get little credit. We are at the back. And after the research is done, we are so done. The front men get the incentives; the front men get the credits. What a bore.

I want to be at the front. I don't want to be in the _formation_; I want to be in the _implementation._ Marketing Manager will do. Marketing Research Manager? Not so.

And yes, I still know nothing about researches. Secondary _infos_ aren't interesting.

The bill completely forgotten.

Time really flies when you aren't doing anything. That afternoon, Kakashi, calls me and I almost jump on my seat.

"Naruto. Come in here." He says. I wonder what's up. His voice seems to hold meaning. My heart fluttered at the thought.

A promotion perhaps? Oh my… yessssss. It must be promotion. The Empire analyses I've done last week were taken in consideration by Mr. Tanaka the CEO of TE. Kakashi said he was proud. I'm getting excited. Oh my, he's going to tell me discreetly so Kiba won't get jealous.

A promotion! This means a higher salary! Oh my, how much can I buy with my increased salary? Two boxes of Chocolate Bizarre at Giacomino. New cuff-links, khakis, and suit from Nathaniel! Oh I'm going to try the new wine at Liquors…

And I'll pay off that bloody VISA bill! A sweet smile appeared on my face as I walk towards his office. Its seven steps away from my desk and just when I entered the opened door…

"Naruto I couldn't possibly come at this press conference. But it'll be interesting. It's Uchiha Corp." he looks at me while thrusting the card. He smiled as he asked, "Will you go?"

I gaped! I don't know how I handed the card even I don't want to. The momentary bliss burst like a bubble.

I'm not getting a promotion. I am not getting a raise. I am not getting the VISA bill paid! How could he do this to me? I feel like being betrayed!

"Something wrong, kid?"

"Umm, no." I utter. My mouth's trembling. I can see my suit, cuff-links, THE CAKE running away before my very eyes! My inner self is weeping in despair, betrayal and all. Just a frocking conference… about new strategic plan. This is what you mean by interesting.

Uchiha Corp. FABULOUS!

**Fear **

**About **

**Being **

**Ultimate **

**Loser **

**Over **

**Uchiha**

**Sasuke**

**!**


End file.
